Regrets and Anger

January 24, 2013 at 22:12 (Uncategorized)

I do regret accepting the admin job.  Yeah, it’s temporary but I’ve come to realise how long five months can be.  Very long indeed – it’s still only January and I want to run away.

In truth, when I said yes, not only was I in a bit of a slump with my teaching, I was also thinking I had made a serious mistake becoming a teacher.  I didn’t seem to be able to get it together.  But that one instance out balanced all the fun I had had teaching so far.  I was almost desperate to do admin.  And I’ll admit to feeling relief at the thought of not teaching for five months.

Unfortunately, I knew I had made a mistake as soon as I started my training.  But it was too late to back out, I was stuck and had to go forward.  Five months of teaching experience will now be lost and that is my second regret.  And my anger is at myself.  I’m angry for not stopping and really thinking, but just going with what was happening around me.

Now that I find myself in this situation I might as well put it to good use.  Methodology and techniques.  I’m lacking in these departments so now is a good time to read up about them, fill in the missing pieces and return to teaching better than I was before.  With this I also want to put together a course plan and I can use these months to do research.   The admin job is 9-5 but a little less of the interwebs and I can do it.

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1 Comment

  1. sapeni said,

    HAPPY belated NEW YEAR!!!!

    Nah! You are never stuck, but that’s a great outlook in the end. You will become a much more powerful teacher now that you have time to sort things out. Everyone needs a break, but I wonder what made you think that you were no good at it…you seem really passionate in this field.

    However, you sound like my twin. I went back to the repetitive job just because it’s predictable. I teach children arts and crafts as a side job, and it’s so wonderful, but I am still worried about teaching full time. I feel there are still some confidence traits I wish to work on to become a better instructor.

    Good luck to you. You have a very interesting career map under your belt. I’m sure every experience has made you more worldly. It sounds like you are on the right track to becoming a strong teacher/novelist/artist.

    I read your post below regarding 2012…2013 is definitely going to wonderful. You’re going to Japan – please share ALL!

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